Is independent play realistic for a young baby and toddler? In short, yes! Keep in mind, though, that independent play can only be supported when our adult expectations match the course of our baby’s development.
Independent play is not:
Getting your baby to play alone for extended periods
Removing your presence entirely
Independent play is:
Helping your baby connect to their toys
Infusing your presence in a way that builds their confidence to explore
Babies and young toddlers are capable of leading their play and focusing intently. These moments of engagement are the crux of independent play – ensuring they are free to lead without grownups interrupting or directing the experience. Moments of quiet focus can last a few short minutes; other times, it could last 30 minutes or more.
Nurturing independent play has a predictable recipe for success:
Physically prepare for play.As the parent, you have to set up their play space, ensure it’s uncluttered and safe, and offer stage-appropriate toys for them to choose from. Without a clear invitation to play, it can be hard for your baby to focus.
Spend quality time.Babies are human beings who crave connection and quality time with us. If we just set up a play space and walk away, we are not fully meeting their needs, and they may struggle to engage. Spend time in your baby’s play space with them, helping them feel loved, safe, and confident.
Learn when to remove yourself.When your baby is focused on an activity and no longer signaling for you, it’s best to be as quiet as possible. You can stay physically present to supervise for safety, but let them have moments that belong to them. This helps them internalize, “I am capable of leading my play.”