You might be tempted to ask your children to adapt to the new baby’s routines, but in reality, it’s best to preserve consistency with young children’s routines while the baby “tags along.”
This is particularly relevant in the newborn stage, as newborns won’t show more predictable rhythms to develop routines until 3-4 months old. Meanwhile, toddlers and young children thrive with routines.
However, your overall pace may need tweaking. If you and your toddler used to do a lot of outings, that may feel daunting for you and overstimulating to your baby. Those first few months may look like:
Slowing down and planning for simpler days
Preserving your older children’s main building blocks as much as possible
Preserving the “building blocks” allows big siblings to be grounded by the familiarity of, “Phew, I can still count on play time with my toys after breakfast,” and, “After dinner, dad still gives me a bubble bath and bedtime story.”
As your baby grows and develops more predictable rhythms, you’ll also want to honor their needs in the family routines. However, baby’s routines shouldn’t fully replace your other children’s routines. Instead, you’ll want to evolve your “family routine” to include every family member within reason (you won’t always be able to cater to everyone, and that’s okay).
To build a family routine, take note of everyone’s individual needs, and pay close attention to times of day that might be hard, where there is a clash. Maybe your baby needs a nap when your older children are alert and eager - you could use those observations and respond by planning:
A home-bound, free-play block. Being at home may be ideal for your baby to nap successfully, and you can prepare a play space in a separate area that allows the siblings to burn off energy.
Or, you could sign your child up for a gymnastics class or take them to a park while planning for a babywearing nap with the baby.
The takeaway: You have options, and catering to your children's unique—sometimes competing needs–is doable with flexibility and adaptability. The key is remembering to periodically evaluate your well-being, too, so that you don’t set yourself up for burnout. If there is a time of day that is tiring for you, that’s a good indicator to add a “rest hour” to the family schedule!