For a toddler, transitioning to a new classroom with new caregivers and new peers can be overwhelming – even if they have been in a nursery program before. If your toddler is moving from the baby class to the toddler class mid-year, it can feel like starting a school year all over again! In any scenario, the transition should be approached with empathy, thoughtfulness, and partnership between family and school.
Return to preparation strategies that have worked in the past, such as:
Planning a meet and greet. Visit the new classroom or see if the school offers in-home visits.
Continue a reliable, consistent drop-off routine during the transition. Keep it short but meaningful.
Share what is changing. Preview verbally and/or pictorially what your toddler can expect from their day. This might mean attaching a photo of their new school room or their new teachers to a simple weekly calendar along with an image of the person who will be picking the child up.
Find little ways to emphasize familiarity and comfort. Other tools, such as family pictures, a transitional object like a string bracelet, a press-on tattoo or stamp, or a social story, can all be grounding. If your child is moving between rooms in the same school, point out what things will remain consistent.
Embrace the warm-up period. When a toddler enters a new environment, it is common for them to be drawn to a “primary” caregiver. Once your toddler is comfortable, they are likely to develop a hierarchy of preference for different caregivers who will all be able to meet the toddler’s needs. Toddlers who feel safe, secure, and connected are best able to engage in exploration and learning. This process shouldn’t be rushed!
Remember that reunions are part of separations. It is important to remember that reunions are a part of separation and that many toddlers experience a resurgence of separation anxiety since they now have the cognition to know that you exist when they cannot see you but not the cognition to know that you will always return. Let your child (and your child’s teachers) know each day who will pick them up and when. Since children do not have a well-developed sense of time, try linking pick-up to an event in the daily schedule, such as an outing or circle time. “Nana will see you after the second circle!”
Expect emotional and physical dysregulation and behavioral regressions during this time. Toddlers have big feelings around separation that they express in multiple ways. While some toddlers happily reunite with their grown-ups at pick-up, it is not unusual for others to either cling to a parent, cry or tantrum or even ignore them. Some of these behaviors may emerge once the child has returned home. Regression in areas like sleep and other kinds of separation, as well as in eating and toileting, are particularly common while a toddler transitions but should go away as a child becomes secure with their new caregivers and in their new routines.
The Emotional Life of the Toddler by Alicia F. Lieberman, Ph.D.
Everyday Goodbyes: Starting School and Early Care: A Guide to the Separation Process by Nancy Balaban